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Mama's Milk, No Chaser

Serving doubles at the breastfeeding bar, straight up with a twist of peaceful parenting.

  • Home
  • Blog
  • For the Lactation Lush
    • Topics
      • Bottles Up!
      • It’s Closing Time (Weaning)
      • Lifestyle Choices
      • Newbie Boobie Concerns
      • Possible Contraindications
      • Problems & Solutions
      • Special Topics
    • Mammary Mixology
      • A Fully-Stocked Bar (What’s in Breast Milk?)
      • Anatomy & Mechanics
      • The Milk-Making Process
    • Supplementing
  • Support Beyond the Bra
    • Birth Classes & Doula Support
    • Hotlines & Help
    • The Legal Limit
  • Titillating Tidbits
    • Baby-Led Solids
    • Milk Drunk Recipes
    • Milk Museum (Art)
    • Trivia
  • About
    • Connect & Contact
    • Copyright & Disclaimer
  • Attachment Parenting
  • Controversies
  • Genital Integrity

Circumcision: Parent With Purpose Interview

hollymilkowski November 1, 2018

I was recently invited to join a dialogue with Lynda Harlos of the talk show Parent With Purpose.

From the video description:

“Deciding to Circumcise or not doesn’t make you a good or bad parent! Be informed and make your decision wisely. Click on this link to take you to the website to get all of the links regarding their website, and all their resources. […] Parent your own way #ParentWithPurpose […] We can help each other instead of judging each other.”

You can watch Part 1 here with Brittany Gillespie Cromar of Intact Utah.

After viewing that segment, click here for Part 2 in which I speak briefly on behalf of Intact Texas/Intact Houston about different topics that are frequently brought up in regard to infant male circumcision. You can also watch it directly on the website if you would like to take advantage of the plethora of attached resources.

Let me know your thoughts! What do you think is the most important message or knowledge about which to spread awareness, when it comes to routine infant circumcision?

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  • Controversies
  • Feminism
  • In the News

Breastfeeding With a History of Sexual Abuse: Women Speak

hollymilkowski October 4, 2018

A few things you might not know, starting with the numbers:

A reported 27% of childbearing-aged women were sexually abused in childhood, and an estimated 40% including adolescent/teen years. According to LLLI, 90% of abusers are male, 70-90% are known to their victims; and for girls, 30-50% of abusers are family members.

These are just numbers. Numbers don’t speak, but many of the individuals behind the statistics are doing just that. Sexual abuse causes lasting trauma that cannot be isolated by a number; it follows the victim throughout life, and if this person is a woman on a path to motherhood it has many specific, new chances for recall of its memory. Pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding bring enhanced susceptibility to a woman’s life, leaving her in jeopardy of rewounding.

Karen Wood, PhD, who notes that 1 in 3 to 1 in 5 Canadian girls are sexually abused in childhood, observed in her paper “Infant feeding experiences of women who were sexually abused in childhood”:

“A history of [childhood sexual abuse] can affect a woman’s experience of breastfeeding, including acting as a trigger for remembering or re[-]experiencing the abuse. Women who were sexually abused as children need to experience a sense of safety, acceptance, sensitivity, and understanding.”

You might assume that women who were sexually abused would be more hesitant to attempt breastfeeding than other mothers, but in fact the opposite has been found to be true. In a nationally representative sample study, women who self-reported past sexual abuse were more than twice as likely to initiate breastfeeding. They also were found to breastfeed at the same rate as those without a history of past abuse.

However, women who were or are currently sexually abused are at greater risk for postpartum depression, disturbed sleep, and perinatal complications. Interestingly, exclusive breastfeeding has been shown in a study to reduce rates of depression and poor sleep among survivors, as compared with formula feedings and mixed feedings (read about the study’s background and a podcast interview with the author here).

Still, night feedings are often especially frightening for survivors of abuse. They may have an especially difficult time managing views of breasts as both sources of nourishment and sexual objects. They may also have significant anxiety around the exposure and vulnerability brought on by public nursing. Read More

  • Newborn Nursing
  • Problems & Solutions
  • Pumping, Expression

For When You’ve Sprung a Breast Milk Leak

hollymilkowski September 28, 2018

Leaky boobs are more of an imposition upon convenience rather than a condition needing a “cure.” If your faucets just don’t seem to turn off, know that although your shirts will get damp, it shouldn’t put a damper on your breastfeeding success. Read More

  • Attachment Parenting
  • Feminism
  • Gentle Parenting

“Just a mother”

hollymilkowski September 21, 2018

I was so done with the world of new motherhood.

I was distancing myself.

I grew tired of writing about motherhood. You know why? Because I grew tired of being a mother. I was tired of everything mother. Being judged because I’m a mother. Always working but never ‘at work’ as a mother. Late nights that never end and early mornings as a mother. All the restrictions I feel as a mother.

I was tired of being a ‘stay at home’ mother. Tired of caring so immeasurably much about my children that my heart is always on the brink of hurting. Tired of having to choose between things that make me happy that don’t involve my children, and things I must do (or want to do) as a mother. Tired of being told it doesn’t have to be that way. It’s hard to make changes when you’re so tired. Read More

  • Attachment Parenting
  • Stories
  • Tandem

Is ‘Weaned’ in the Eye of the Beholder?

hollymilkowski August 8, 2018

 

My older son weaned a few months ago at 5 and a half years old. At least that’s how I’d describe his complete lack of requests to nurse during this time. He doesn’t seem to agree however!

A conversation we had earlier today, as we watched little brother J comfort nurse: Read More

  • Attachment Parenting
  • Parenting

For a Vegan Mom Raising a Vegan Baby

hollymilkowski August 2, 2018

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You can stay vegan while raising your baby — and s/he can be vegan, too!

There are a few scary stories out there. You’ve probably heard of the malnourished child, starved to death, medically neglected? Parents happened to be vegan? Yeah, it’s easy to point the finger at veganism for this tragedy. But the reality is, we’ve heard the same terrible tale many times and somehow the presence of (or lack of) animal products in the family diet is only questioned when vegans are involved.

Truth is, many physicians agree that a child can thrive on a well-planned vegan diet and that nutrition based on a foundation of whole, fresh foods is the key to balanced health.

Learn more about the benefits of a plant-based diet for kids here, here, and here. Read More

  • Natural Baby
  • Natural Birth
  • new baby

Jaundice & the Breastfed Baby

hollymilkowski June 10, 2018

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Newborn jaundice is normal in most cases, appearing within 2-3 days post-birth, and affecting up to 60% of full-term babies.

Physiologic jaundice is caused by a buildup of bilirubin, which is produced when red blood cells are broken down. The liver is responsible for eliminating the bilirubin, but a newborn’s liver is often too immature to efficiently handle this process yet. This causes a yellow cast on the skin (which can be trickier to detect in dark-skinned babies) and the eyeballs. This resolves itself in a week or two as the baby matures further and red blood cell levels have lowered.

In a breastfed baby, jaundice is more common and tends to persist longer than a formula-fed baby (as breastfed babies are the standard, this means it’s the norm). True breastmilk jaundice, which only affects 0.5% to 2.4% of newborns, sticks around longer than one or two weeks, sometimes up to twelve (now, this shouldn’t be confused with breastfeeding jaundice, which is caused by starvation/lack of proper milk intake). Bilirubin levels might even increase at the two-week mark. None of this is a cause for concern in an otherwise healthy baby.

On how breastmilk and formula compare in causality of newborn jaundice, Dr. Sears says:

“The difference is thought to be due to an as-yet unidentified factor in breastmilk that promotes increased intestinal absorption of bilirubin, so that it goes back into the bloodstream rather than moving on to the liver. Higher rates of jaundice in breastfed infants may also be related to lower milk intakes in the first days after birth, because of infrequent or inefficient feeding.”

Hence, why medical treatments should be avoided unless truly necessary because they threaten to interrupt breastfeeding further. As breastmilk helps move the baby’s bowels to remove excess bilirubin, frequent feedings will hasten the normal bodily process.

If bilirubin levels have reached more than 20 milligrams, a health provider might recommend treatment with phototherapy (ask about fiber optic blankets, an especially good option for nursing moms).

What not to do: do not supplement with sugar water, and do not restrict the baby from breastfeeding.

Links:

  • “Breastfeeding and Jaundice” – Jack Newman, MD, FRCPC, International Breastfeeding Centre
  • “Babies with Jaundice” – Dr. Sears
  • “Guidelines for Management of Jaundice in the Breastfeeding Infant Equal to or Greater Than 35 Weeks’ Gestation” – The Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine Protocol Committee

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  • Events
  • Stories
  • Uncategorized

Mi Patio Cafe: Serving Animal Products to Unaware Vegan Families Isn’t Ethical

hollymilkowski June 6, 2018

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I’m quite upset to learn that food truck vendor Mi Patio Cafe & Grill sold animal flesh and animal dairy byproducts on nearly every food option on their menu at Vegandale Food & Drink Festival, where all food and beverages were intended to be fully vegan. Customers were livid and felt betrayed (by a local business nonetheless).

Hearing this news brought up a memory from my own experience at Vegandale. I helped at a New York City-based vendor table called Monk’s Meats for a few hours, assisting in sandwich prep. One customer glanced at the sandwich handed to him, then looked back at its server. “Is this meat?” he asked suspiciously. “Ah, no…” he received in reply. Overhearing this exchange, I thought to myself, Wow, how ridiculous! Let’s not be *that* kinda vegan… I mean, this is a vegan festival! Looks like this man had the right idea to question after all. (For the record, Monk’s Meats is a 100% plant-based business).

 

Vegandale was promoted as ‘100% vegan… Where you don’t have to worry about ingredients,’ and this reassurance was given in the website FAQ as well. We paid $10-$20 per ticket to enjoy a fully vegan community event with promise to uphold a certain standard of ethics.

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  • Attachment Parenting
  • Events
  • Genital Integrity

What Vegans Said About Circumcision

hollymilkowski May 28, 2018

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I know some of you roll your eyes when I say “Circumcision isn’t vegan.” But hear me out.

On a recent weekend, I represented Intact Vegan Network at Texas Vegan MayFest, a spring festival hosted by Rowdy Girl Sanctuary. If you haven’t heard of it already, it’s a vegan-owned and operated farm animal sanctuary in the heart of Texas cattle country. In fact, one of the owners used to be a cattle rancher himself before turning vegan.

“Intact Vegan Network is here to talk about… why it isn’t a good thing to cut off your baby’s foreskin,” announced Rowdy Girl Sanctuary founder Renee King-Sonnen during vendor introductions.

Cue me in the back behind my table, waving.

If bodybuilding, skincare, and musical artists can have a presence at vegan events, and we accept that it just makes sense, it can make sense for a circumcision education table to be there too.

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  • Can I Nurse if...?
  • Formula
  • Natural Baby

Vegan While Breastfeeding

hollymilkowski May 22, 2018
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Photo credit: Bloom Photography & Design

Is your little bean sprout kind of literally a bean sprout, thanks to your meat-free milk? Many women remove animal products from their diets in hopes of improved health, and thankfully it has been shown that animal-friendly lifestyles are not only perfectly safe but also as beneficial to a breastfed baby as his mother.

I read about maternal vegan diets while breastfeeding and had no concerns that my milk would still be perfectly healthy (in fact, likely more so). When my baby was exclusively consuming vegan breast milk, he was in the 94th percentile for weight, delightfully roll-y, meeting all milestones, and clearly not starved for nutrients. Read More

  • Attachment Parenting
  • Birth
  • Natural Baby

Vegan While Pregnant & Birthing

hollymilkowski May 18, 2018

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Looking to enjoy an animal-friendly pregnancy, birth, and beyond? Read on for some tips I picked up along the way…

First, a little about my experience: I decided to eat a vegan diet four and a half years ago and shortly thereafter began adapting the rest of my lifestyle to be cohesive with veganism. Why? For sake of brevity, I’d say in this order: 1) for animals, 2) for my health, 3) for the planet.

Before, I was a type of pescetarian for some years. I ate fish on a regular basis (I’ll admit, I was addicted to sashimi grade raw fish — blech!), scrambled eggs on special occasions, and I didn’t consume much dairy or cheese directly, but also didn’t notice or care if it happened to be hidden in foods (which is most of them, it turns out!). So for me, the switch to a vegan diet was a pretty much a matter of ordering vegetable sushi, scrambling tofu instead of egg, and checking labels for dairy and other hidden animal ingredients.

My oldest son had just turned one a few months prior to this lifestyle change. He was starting to eat food other than breast milk, and it ended up being plenty of time to get adjusted before my next pregnancy, which was fully vegan and perfectly healthy.

Both of my kids are vegan (M is five, J just turned 2) and so is my husband, so that makes things easy when it comes to dining out, stocking the pantry, cooking meals and so on.

Skip ahead to sections:

1). Vegan While Pregnant & Birthing

  • Tips
    Prenatal Supplements
    Prenatal Vaccines
    The Orange Drink
    Candles Used During Labor
    Artificial Induction & Pain Management
    Cord Separation
    Consuming Your Placenta

2). Vegan While Breastfeeding

  • Tips
  • Mother’s Breast Milk
  • Donor Breast Milk
  • Plant-Based Formula
  • Conventional Formula
  • Homemade Formula
  • Lanolin Nipple Cream

And coming soon in the next post…

3). Vegan While Raising Baby

  • Tips
  • Vitamins
  • Baby Foods/Plant-Based BLW
  • Baby Products
  • OTC Medicines
  • Circumcision
  • Diapers
Disclosure statement because I’m not a Doctor, m’kay?
The following is not intended as medical advice. Always ask your doctor/pediatrician/naturopath/health provider for a professional opinion before taking any advice suggested here, which is for educational purposes only and to be considered at your own risk.
Also, please note – this post contains no paid affiliate links.

Read More

  • Attachment Parenting
  • Feminism
  • Parenting

Beautiful Quotes in Celebration of Mothers

hollymilkowski May 11, 2018

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“A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.” ― Cardinal Mermillod Read More

  • Attachment Parenting
  • Events
  • Genital Integrity

Changing Diapers & Changing Minds (About Circumcision)

hollymilkowski April 25, 2018
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Cuteness overload “Born Perfect” cloth diaper found here.

The Great Cloth Diaper Change happened this weekend and I spent it educating about circumcision, a surgery that many American baby boys undergo in their early diapering days. I represented Intact Houston at Wellspring Midwifery Care & Birth Center‘s GCDC event, at which attendees attempted to set a new record for the number of babies changed into a cloth diaper simultaneously across the globe.

First, if you’ve ever wondered about how to cloth diaper a baby after circumcision, please read this.

Now I’d like to share some of the interactions we had throughout the day.

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Read More

  • Attachment Parenting
  • Nursing Support
  • Photos

Encouragement For Full-Term & Tandem Breastfeeders

hollymilkowski April 17, 2018

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🌻 These two milk siblings, blood brothers, M and J. Just over 5 years and almost 2 years old, respectively — the former the same age as my nursing journey overall and the latter the same as my experience in tandem nursing. Such tiny numbers really. Hard to imagine we were nothing and growing and birthing and birthed and empty and nourished more than once over in that amount of time.

M and J don’t like to be separated. Though they annoy each other and feel overwhelmed with the art of sharing from time to time, as siblings do, they prefer each other’s close company. J learns a lot from his big brother (like how to get dressed and sing) and M never hesitates to include J in his activities.

Their bond began when J was in my womb, every day growing stronger until one day he’d feel ready for life Earthside. From age 2.5 to 3.5 years, M watched my belly swell bigger and bigger. He knew his little brother was inside ‘swimming in water.’ He knew J could hear him so he spoke to him often. He said “Good morning!,” and “Good night!” every day for months, with a morning kiss and night kiss (and lots of extras in between).

He saw J for the first time around midnight, about an hour after he was born. I was laying in our bed with J on my breast. M gave J a kiss — a real, live, salty, good morning and good night kiss — right on his freshly born little head.

M had the honor of separating his little brother’s cord. We chose a Sacred Severance ceremony involving quiet, meditation, and burning of the cord instead of cutting. M, his dad, and our doula held candles to the cord in gentle recognition of this significant alteration. M was not present for the birth so this was his special contribution to our welcoming of J into the land of lung breathers.

J has known M his whole life. Though M was Earthside 3.5 years longer, it seems he’s known J just as long. Read More

  • Can I Nurse if...?
  • Cultural Differences
  • Feminism

Breastfeeding Moms, It’s Time To Ditch Dairy

hollymilkowski April 8, 2018

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In the process of birthing her child, opening up to allow life to pass through her and howling or whimpering along with thousands of other human mothers and multitudes more female creatures, a woman feels a primal connection to her animal nature. Herein is sparked an unspoken understanding of The Mother Code: all mothers worldwide, of all ages and races and species, learn this unspoken language in their gut and communicate it with their hearts.

This Code is founded upon an equal, shared love for our babies, a desire for the best for our babies — and what’s best for our babies is, by protective feature of Mother Nature, likewise best for us. The Code recognizes another mother’s profundity of pain when her child is hurt or lost, and it celebrates her joy when motherhood is thriving. It sees the essential closeness of mother and baby as gold; the syncing of their bodies and spirits as fact.

As a breastfeeding mother, you know the depth of emotions that make breastfeeding possible. You know the struggle when it doesn’t work, and when it gets painful and exhausting and when we face external obstacles. You know the anxiety when questioning whether your body ‘works,’ whether biology has failed you or if you’re ‘woman enough’ to handle the pressure of this responsibility. You know the Breastfeeding Mother Code.

Lactation works the same in all mammals. Emotions and hormones are the fuel for the mechanics of lactogenesis, a natural triumph of a nurturing, healing system that has secured mammalian survival since, well, the evolution (or divine creation) of mammaries.

So keep this Code in mind, because now it’s time to talk about dairy cows.

Read More

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