Category: Nursing Support

One in The Womb & One on The Boob: Breastfeeding During Pregnancy

hollymilkowski September 19, 2015

I really never imagined I’d be nursing during a pregnancy. It amazes me the endurance of this tradition we’ve made and how it’s seen us through so much.

I don’t know if almost three-year-old MaiTai will tire of it soon, or if aversion will strike the crazy into me and call a halt by my discretion. Or if we’ll just keep nursing like we always have, because it’s as normal a thing to do as would be not choosing to continue.

I do know that nursing isn’t so comfortable anymore. Aversion is milder so far than with bleeding cycles, but it just feels… different. Not all oxytocin-rush-of-pleasantness, squeeze-him-tight and never let go, butterflies of love swooping through my body kind of stuff like I wrote about here.

It feels how I imagine some people who’ve never breastfed might think breastfeeding feels like — a little person sucking on your skin, perhaps a most unwanted hickey? Still it’s not “gross” (he’s my baby, he’ll never be icky to me!) but it’s not a street paved in my favor as far as physical contentment. Emotionally though? Another story.

I Can’t Understand Black Breastfeeding Week (But I Still Support It)

hollymilkowski August 25, 2015

There are many things I didn’t get about the history of Black Breastfeeding Week, which runs from August 25th-31st. To my credit, I can barely keep up with the history of breastfeeding in general (I mean, the practice does date all the way back to the beginning of mammal-kind).

Prior to looking into the celebration that is Black Breastfeeding Week, I already knew why White Breastfeeding Week doesn’t exist: because all of National Breastfeeding Month is about support and understanding for every last breastfeeding person, and whites aren’t a minority or marginalized group.

Note: Before I continue, please be aware I’m no expert in racial discrimination and though I try my best to overcome my own ignorance at any opportunity, I’m a work in progress here. So I ask for gentleness if I’ve unknowingly represented cultural inaccuracies; my heart is in the right place. ❤ 🙂

We Breastfed In Public For As Much Attention As Possible This Weekend

hollymilkowski August 3, 2015

We were all proud. We have been proud, actually. So we showed up ready to nurse.

We did it modestly, though not one of us bothered to “cover up.” We did it with discretion, being that we nursed exclusively among supporters — though we wanted to be seen and heard. So we shared our experiences on every format far and wide with a movement of hashtags and brelfies and nurse-ins to prove that breastfeeding can work (more on that in a bit).

We wanted to count; in fact, we made sure we were being counted.

And we broke the standing world record: 14,889 children (simultaneously!) latched on to nurse for at least one full minute on Friday and Saturday all over the world for the Global Big Latch On. I attended one of the Houston events as a local representative for peaceful parenting/Dr. Momma. There, 73 moms and 82 children were officially latched on!

This event kicked off World Breastfeeding Week, for which the year’s theme is “Breastfeeding and Work: Let’s Make it Work!” The idea is to draw attention to issues faced by working mothers who want to breastfeed.

It also reminds of all the things that hope so badly for breastfeeding to not work.

21 Ways To Celebrate National Breastfeeding Month Other Than, Well, Breastfeeding

hollymilkowski July 31, 2015

1.) TRIVIA TIME

Post breastfeeding trivia on your social media. Here are a few fun fact categories to start you off:

2). SAY THANKS TO MOMS

Thank a mother for breastfeeding. Put one of these cards in the hands of a mother you see nursing in public — or if you’re the shy type, leave it on the windshield of her car or tell her “I think you dropped this” before scampering off. So long as she gets the message, mission accomplished!

Check out a selection of cards here (Spanish version also available).

A Few Considerations For Same-Sex Parents Regarding Breastfeeding

hollymilkowski June 26, 2015

Photo Credit: Adam Bouska, NOH8. Featuring Mahaliyah Grace of Phoenix and Cindy Manit of San Francisco. Though the aforementioned subjects are reportedly are not a couple, this photo is worth a thousand words in all the wonderful possibilities it represents.

A historic moment witnessed today: Same-sex marriage is now legal in all 50 states of the U.S.!

Now that I’ve cried all my happy tears, I’m thinking back on the great struggle it took to get us here. A stigma still exists against same-sex couples adopting, for instance. But same-sex couples know love is love, and many of them wish to share that love with families of their own.

Have you given much thought to the issue of infant feeding by same-sex parents? For the vast majority of babies, breast is best. And the vast majority of all couples, regardless of sex, want the best for their babies. So how does that work — is it even possible?

I Caused My Relatives “Heartache” By Breastfeeding In Public

hollymilkowski June 15, 2015

First, A Little Background…

I went to a destination wedding this weekend in Charleston with my husband a.k.a. The Designated Dad (TDD) and our nursling MaiTai. The Bride and Groom are close relatives and TDD was the Best Man.

The first night I was excited to attend the rehearsal dinner. Shortly after arriving, I left briefly to use the bathroom. On my way back I was cornered — literally cornered — by the dinner’s host (another close family member). Let’s call him… Dinner Host.

“I need you to do me a big favor,” Dinner Host said. Ooh, exciting! I must be in on some kind of special surprise, I figured. Jokingly, I said, “Maybe, depends on the favor!”

Dinner Host’s face turned solemn and funereal. Something serious was afoot. Something dramatic. The thought actually crossed my mind if he was about to ask me to take someone to the Emergency Room.

“Holly,” he said. “I’m asking that if [MaiTai] needs to nurse tonight, that you go somewhere else. I know you’re very passionate about this, but honestly it isn’t the time or place.” Read More

The Sweetest Child Care Suite Of All

hollymilkowski April 22, 2015

I never really liked the idea of a public breastfeeding room. The idea of some forced facade of comfort, inconvenience of location, the feeling of imposed separation rather than intimacy or community…

However, in practice and in reality, such a room can be a lifesaver for many families.

A private, quiet place to express breast milk is vital for many mothers. This kind of room is also useful in busy, loud areas like airports where an overstimulated baby can benefit from a break in the cacophony. It’s also generally a less-populated space than a public restroom, making diaper changes easier and quicker instead of stressful.

The fact that businesses and public venues in our country are stepping up to treat mothers and children to comfy, competitively lavish, Yelp-worthy spots to rest and renew is wonderful. It’s the thought that counts at least, and I can tell that many public establishments are really trying, if not fully succeeding just yet. (No worries, us mothers of tiny tikes know how to shed a grudge).

Interestingly, it may be especially helpful if the space is NOT called a public breastfeeding room (more on that in a bit). And even more so if the space is designed with educated intention.

Here are a few things I’ve noticed about what makes or breaks the overall quality and acceptability of a child care room.

Child-Led Weaning Awareness Series Pt. 4: What People Say

hollymilkowski April 9, 2015

This is the fourth and final part of a short series about child-led weaning (click for part one, two, and three).

We know the process of weaning — whether led by the child, the mother, a doctor, or society’s expectations — is an emotional, personal, and rather fascinating one.

Let’s finish the discussion with what formula companies, world health authorities and respected figures, parents, researchers, authors, and children have to say about breastfeeding beyond infancy.

Child-Led Weaning Awareness Series Pt. 2: Common Weaning Concerns

hollymilkowski April 6, 2015

This is the second part of a short series about child-led weaning (part one here). We know the process of weaning — whether led by the child, the mother, a doctor, or society’s expectations — is an emotional, personal, and rather fascinating one.

Let’s continue with a discussion about these concerns:

Nursing strikes
What are common concerns in regard to weaning?
Does it spoil an older infant to breastfeed for comfort?

Child-Led Weaning Awareness Series Pt. 1: Weaning Before Age One

hollymilkowski April 2, 2015

This post begins a short series about child-led weaning. What is it? Who does it? What are the common concerns and myths? The process of weaning — whether led by the child, the mother, a doctor, or society’s expectations — is an emotional, personal, and rather fascinating one.

Let’s start off with a discussion about these questions:

Can a child self-wean under the age of one?
What events are commonly misinterpreted as a desire to wean?
Should a child be weaned under the age of one?

Biting & Baby Teeth With Breastfeeding

hollymilkowski March 9, 2015

It’s pretty annoying when your baby sprouts a tooth and suddenly everyone’s clamoring to know if he’s bitten you, right? (Oh, the drama!). Most likely, those comments are more dangerous than any potential bite itself. Fear of getting bitten by your child is no reason to avoid breastfeeding. Trust me, this is not a problem exclusive to the lactating set — as a formula-fed baby myself, I had a rather serious biting problem in my toddlerhood and the rampage was released upon everything and anything… except nipples (but was no less painful to tolerate, I recall).

Student-Made “Call Me Maybe” Breastfeeding Parody Shows Young People Get It

hollymilkowski March 2, 2015

I just came across this parody made last fall by a group of students at Saint Francis Xavier University in Antigonish, N.S. It’s cute, educational, inspiring and funny — so why am I crying? I don’t know, maybe I’m just hormonal. Or maybe I’m just so happy that today’s generation of parents-to-be seem to really get it.

The video (scroll down to view) is a parody of Carly Rae Jepsen’s hit song “Call Me Maybe,” showing breastfeeding (okay, pseudo-breastfeeding of dolls, which I’m a pro at myself) in various real-life scenarios to expose ingrained hypocrisies and common yet ludicrous reactions.

How to Nurse in Public — With Modesty!

hollymilkowski February 8, 2015

There’s got to be a way to talk about nursing, modesty, and covers without painting the uncovered breastfeeders as selfish exhibitionists or the covered ones as selfish prudes, right? In duly respecting nursinghood as a time for openness of many things — including our minds, hearts, and shirts — we help re-normalize a society that inaccurately views breasts as sex organs.

I hate to hear this: “Here’s XYZ method that will allow you to breastfeed in public without anyone even knowing you’re breastfeeding!”

Reminder: You Don’t HAVE to Cover

hollymilkowski February 4, 2015

It is your legal right to breastfeed anywhere you are lawfully allowed to be, covered or uncovered, with any amount of exposed breast skin as might naturally show in the process of feeding. No one can make you leave and carry on in, say, a public bathroom or the backseat of your car.

Coming Out From Under the Covers

hollymilkowski January 23, 2015

I was waiting on my dinner at a restaurant, newly pregnant with my first child. Though I sat at the table preparing to nourish myself and, by default, my unborn baby, I wasn’t too familiar with the feeding of an infant outside the womb. After all, I’d only ever fed myself, my dogs, and my goldfish (and a few plants, but that never ended well).

I was ignorant to the issues moms face when feeding babies outside of their wombs. I knew nothing of a “formula versus breast milk” controversy. I knew nothing of the media-fueled “Mommy Wars.” I knew nothing of how women are harassed for feeding their babies however they choose to do so. I had a lot of assumptions, but you see, assumptions are like opinions, and you know what they say about those.